Leave Me Alone

I got pulled over today on the way to church.

Long story short, people were driving very slowly (40-ish) on Murray (speed limit 45), so I passed them (maxed out at 50 - and my speedometer is 2-3 mph fast). If you were a casual observer, it would appear that I was going "fast" relative to the other cars on the road, but that would also be (incorrectly) assuming they themselves were going the speed limit.

So I found myself on the side of the road. The cop's reason for pulling me over was "it looked like I was going fast." That's it. She didn't catch me on radar (in fact, I had just passed a photo radar van no problem), she didn't pace me. Her argument was "you blew by me and I was going 40." Yeah, I can see how that would happen. You were driving slower than the posted limit.

But she still decided to pull me over and make me late for church. Sort of reminds me of those old Celica commercials where the old man is yelling at the parked car to slow down. Or the one with the dog.

I knew from the time she walked up to my window she couldn't give me a ticket because she didn't have anything - and I wasn't doing anything. I've been careful about the latter and have a spotless record so show for it. Of course, she didn't know I knew this, so I played along.

The last time this happened in Corvallis (where cops are mean), I was kind of a jerk to the officer because she was kind of a jerk to me (accused me of trying to elude her even though I pulled off at the next street). This lady was nice enough, so I didn't call her on the absurdity of the stop. I even through in some meek, nervous-sounding apology to make her feel better about the job she was doing. I can only assume the reason she pulled me over was that she needed some sort of validation. She knew she couldn't give me a ticket for anything, so why bother with the stop? It was a pretty good performance, and maybe I should feel bad about that, but if she went on her way feeling good, well, who's to complain? I had a good laugh myself.

I don't disrespect police officers. I have friends who are cops and I know they are vital in our evil society. But I have a real hard time with getting pulled over because "it looked liked you were going fast." That's a waste of my time, the cop's time, and taxpayer resources. Go catch a real criminal - we have enough of them. Or if you want to pull someone over, get the soccer moms in their minivans swerving all over the road on their cell phones. They're the real threat. But please leave me alone.